when they talk about you like you aren’t there.

Two nights ago, I shot one of the biggest annual events at my college. Not only was it an absolute blast to capture, but it felt so warm and comforting in a loud and lively way to witness and appreciate the raw joy and excitement of hundreds of my friends and fellow students.

Shortly after the event wrapped up, several cars of friends and I sped off to In-N-Out Burger to refuel our quite vacant stomachs with quality you can taste. With such a large group, it was expected that we would have to split up amongst several tables, which during late night rush hour were bound to be spread apart. It was here that I overheard another table talking about me like I wasn’t there.

There are a handful of compliments, both explicit and implicit, that are unrivaled in the realm of creative work. Having prospective clients sent your way, being asked about your workflow, and of course, the coveted honor of having your work set as someone’s Instagram profile picture, just to name a few. But arguably the best feeling a creative can have is genuine, verbal appreciation of their work in a conversation they aren’t even a part of.

There’s this one episode of Doctor Who with an incredibly touching scene where Vincent Van Gogh is transported to the future (2010, his future not ours!) and overhears an art critic speak with the highest level of admiration for his work. I think the scene perfectly encapsulates the pure ecstasy of having people authentically appreciate your work. Furthermore, I think the scene perfectly encapsulates the pure ecstasy of having people authentically appreciate you.

Genuinely speaking kindly about others is something that I believe is gradually decreasing in our world. It’s far more common for people to speak negatively behind one’s back than kindly. To me, this brief and ordinary moment that I’m sure no one at the other table has thought twice of in the past few days has had a lasting impact on me. It was a reminder of the power of pure and sincere compliments.

So I want to leave you with a simple challenge, one that is totally original and insightful and definitely not obvious and/or the big take-home line from Everything Everywhere All at Once. I challenge you to be kind. Be kind in a world that often isn’t. Be kind without hoping for anything in return. Be kind both in front of peoples’ faces as well as behind their backs. Be kind for the pure and sole sake of being kind. Be authentically kind. It’s free! And who knows, maybe you’ll end up unknowingly making someone’s week while they munch away at a double-double at 1 AM on a random Thursday night in October.